So today I realized that my "baby" isn't a baby anymore, he went for his 18 month appointment and got his shots ( my kid is so awesome that he just sits there no crying no screaming just looks at the nurse like what the crap are you doing to my leg).Jay called me afterwards, Jay takes RIley to the doctors alot because he is off Monday-Tuesday so it works out for us, so he called me and says to me ok so his next appointment is schedule for May 5 it's his 2 year appointment. And as he said the words it hit me like a ton of bricks.. he's gonna be 2! Where did my last 2 years go?? How did this happen? Can I make this stop?? Oh geeze!! I love my baby more then anything and now he is gonna be 2 and won't need me anymore ( ok ok that is a jump but you know where I am going )

Halloween was a HIT!

Ok, so Halloween isn't my favorite holiday the thought of people scaring the crap out of little kids doesn't make me happy. But now that I have a little guy we do Halloween, and we do Halloween BIG! I think that we made it to 3 different pumpkin patches this year, and we bought 5 pumpkins ( two of which hit the dust before the day even arrived!)

So Halloween is a big deal.. so we headed down to my mom's house in Clovis to meet up with my sister and brother in-law. Grandma made Rileys' halloween costume this year, too cute he was a bag of peanut M&M'S. My mom makes the cutest things, what would we do without grandma??? So we got there and Riley of course helped Aunt Jess crave her pumpkin, and the rest of us all got to crave ours ( Aunt Jess wouldn't want it any other way!)

Then we headed out for trick or treating, this was Riley's 1st year and yes I must say I cried down the drive of the first house ( no one saw me :P) it was so cute he would wander up to the door and stand there like what the heck are you people making me do? Only one kid scared him, the one with the gorilla mask on. But by the end of the night he was good at it! It was the best Halloween I have had in a long time! We even got Mom to be part of Riley's posse of M & M'S..I hope everyone had a great halloween!

Weekend :-)

So this weekend was a busy one for us, we went out to dinner for my birthday on Saturday Night to this new restaurant in Roseville called Johnny Garlic's ( It's Guy from the food network). We got there at around 6 ish and we had a great time the food was soo good and Riley really liked the Garlic potato chips with french onion dip. The main food was good too, but the company my husband and Riley was the best part of the night. After the last few weeks I really didn't want to celebrate my birthday but I am glad that Jay made me. We had a good time!
Sunday morning we had a breast cancer walk at the capital with my friend Amy and her little lady Katelyn. Riley was in no mood to do a 5k walk but we made him anyways. Once I get the pictures downloaded I will show you where my son ended up at the end of the walk!

Then we were off to the pumpkin farm ( again) I didn't need another pumpkin seeing as how we already have 4 but I brought home 2 more. They are both green though..so cute! Riley got a pumpkin sprout that someone pulled off the vine, it's way small and is rotting as we speak on the porch but he loved the thing and carried it around for about 1 hour. We went with our friends that have 2 year old twins. They are so cute and 1 year older then Riley ( almost exactly one year apart) So I get a kick out of doing things like this with them because I feel like I am seeing into the future of what Riley will be doing next year..
We headed home after that and I was pooped! I was asleep in bed by 9pm, Jessica even called and 9:15 and I don't even remember the phone ringing!
Well that was our weekend..Busy just like we like it.. And next weekend will be busy too..Can't wait for my visitors!

Riley

So everyone knows Riley is funny. But he is a wierdo sometimes. This morning my wonderful smiling child woke me up with in the baby montier saying mom, hi, mom hi, then when I went to get him he was laying down in the crib with his hands threw the sides waving at me! So strange.

For those that have known me awhile, becoming a mom wasn't high on my list of things to do. Because well..I like myself ALOT. and with kids you dont really get to just do whatever you want to do. So when I first had Riley I just kept thinking to myself what did I do? Can I return him? It took me a good hmm 2-3 months to really enjoy being a mom. I know that sounds really bad to some people but it's the truth. ( And we all know I like to tell the truth) And now Riley is my joy to the day. And after some recents events I really know how lucky I am to have my little guy healthy.

Now, I can't wait to have another..but some people...i.e Jay has a "plan" . P,S Plans SUCK :-P Just kidding..

Worst Day of My Life

Worst Day of My Life
I don't know if I should write this or not..but I am going too..So as most of you know my sister's son passed away almost 2 weeks ago. It's been one of the worst times of my life. That day that I got the call from Scott was the worst day of my entire life. All I could think about was my sister sitting in this room.. and not having her Clayton. I can't even tell you how my heart broken at the very minute. She is my best friend and for her to have this happen is just not fair. I have gone threw every emotion in the book, mad, sad, gulity.. you name it I have felt it. I just can't even imagine what she is going through. I know that I can't make her better, and I think that is what hurts the most. I can not make my sister feel better, I can't take her pain away and most of all I can't give her Clayton.
I hurt so bad that she is in so much pain. I cry alot when no one is around because I just want my sister to have her chance to be the great mommy that I know that she can be. I get so mad when people say "oh maybe there is a reason this happened" umm there is NO GOOD reason why this happened. Nothing you tell me will make this ok. I also can't stand when people say oh maybe she should be doing this instead. I really want to hurt those people. I want to turn around and scream in there face, have you ever had your baby boy die? No, so shut the f-bomb up!
I miss Clayton too, I was so excited to be his Aunt, and to know this little guy that I had been talking to for the last 9 months. I was ready to spoil that little boy rotten just like my sister spoils Riley. Jessica is the best Aunt on the planet to that little guy, and I wanted to be just like my sister! It's just not fair!! I cant even tell anyone how bad my heart is broken for my sister. I just want to hold her, and tell her it will be ok, but I don't know if it will be ok.
So that's my rant..I needed to get it out..
I miss you little Clayton Andrew Reed!